It was "the math" that undid me.
The day started with the discussion of the article "Redefining Sucess in Mathematics Teaching and Learning" by Margaret Smith. It was our homework. In our smaller plenary (it amuses me to no end that I had heard this word before, and it was at the Higher Things Lutheran You Conference. Lutherans are all about academics!) We were spit into groups of three to find the three most important parts to us and then discuss them in a go around. When we joined back into the plenary we would have to connect our number one with the previous groups number one.
The article is about one teachers releasing her control of the classroom(teaching and telling) to let the students engage themselves in the learning. The teacher's responsibility is to create worthwhile tasks that challenge the students, creates some frustration(disequilibrium), and helps to develop their stamina to persevere. These changes do not happen over night.
the students were used to the teacher feeding them the answers when they didn't get it. The teacher found she had to rewrite some of the lessons and break them down into smaller steps. She felt that once the students started have more success she could up the cognitive demand. She also learned though there needs to be a gradual release of that support and the students build up their stamina in problem solving.
One of my number one "A Ha!" moments was holding the students accountable for their own learning. "The class was responsible for understanding the solutions," and if they didn't it was their responsibility to ask questions till they did understand. (This part is important for what happens to me later on.)
I loved the table that was included in the article, "Key Elements in Henderson's Efforts to Redefine Sucess for Herself and Students." My quote that I starred,
"Students have a responsibility and an obligation to make sense of mathematics by asking questions when they do not understand and by being able to explain and justify their solutions and solution paths when they do understand."
It was stressed that students need to be able to persevere and seek more when they are stuck. Real growth comes from stuck points and mistakes.When students don't give up and keep working it is like it cements the math to the brain. The teacher facilitates the learning. By asking questions and by having other students involved in the discourse the teacher can let the student come to the discovery. (NO FUNNELING ALLOWED!) It is a peer learning experience.
What strikes me the most about this article are the changes the teacher makes in the classroom. It is a release of control and a gift to the students. The student's become their own best teachers. It's what makes learning stick! It is all based on brain research!
The last point I really liked was on reflecting on the teacher's practises in the classroom. A teacher should not be alone in this endeavor or reflection. It is critical to have the support of colleagues to bounce these experiences off of and even lesson plan together. An Instructional math coach is also a great resource to have in the school.
What does this have to do with math tears? Well, I spent time reading, underlining and discussing this article. It was kind of stuck like cement in my brain. I could not ignore what I read.
Right before lunch our instructor set us up for the math. Yesterday we covered the properties of division. We spent a good 45 minutes discussing the attributes of a right triangle, nonright triangle, parallelogram, and a trapezoid. We made a public record. The actual problem was going to be creating a formula for finding the area of any parallelogram, right triangle, nonright triangle, and or trapezoid. All of these would have to be justifiable
We could only use the formula for area of a square, our public record, and paper triangles we could fold and cut. Everyone in the group must be able to justify the formula. Everyone needed to work together. We counted off , and I was a four along with 3 other men. One was Woody so I knew I could count on him to explain to me. I was in a panic already about doing the math. I announced right on that I would need help.
We got back from lunch and 2 of them were already cutting out the triangles. The younger man was already saying we should start by making a parallelogram out of the 2 non right triangles. It was this discourse between the two of them. I tried to help out by taping and tracing the pieces but the man did not like it and ripped it off. I asked them 3 different times to slow down and explain to me what they were doing. I was ignored until the 3rd gentlemen asked me if I understood what they were doing? I said no. You are going to fast for me.
My first gut reaction was to just sit there and give up. They were not including me, and they were not answering my questions very well. I did not do this because of "I am responsible for my own learning" and that means asking questions. I tried. I really did try to be responsible for my learning.
All I could think of was how sorry I felt for his students if this was an example of his teaching.
Woody finally did try to explain it to me, but it was too late. Dang it, once the tears start I don't seem to have any control over them. I went to sob gently in the handicap stall in the women's bathroom. Later Jessica talked me off "my ledge" and I was able to go back into the classroom and sit at the table.
I am dismayed that once again I could not control my math phobia. I feel confident in my teaching but I am still not a "mathematician"!
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